Bread Bowl
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| No. 87 – Orange County Otters | |||||||||||||
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| Position: | Tight End | ||||||||||||
| Personal information | |||||||||||||
| Born: | January 8, 2036 (aged 25) A Panera Bread Kitchen, Missouri, U.S. | ||||||||||||
| Height: | 6 ft 11 in (2.11 m) | ||||||||||||
| Weight: | 281 lb (127 kg) | ||||||||||||
| Username: | Waldo | ||||||||||||
| Career information | |||||||||||||
| College: | Bread Loaf School of English | ||||||||||||
| ISFL Draft: | 2057 / Round: 3 / Pick: 37 | ||||||||||||
| DSFL Draft: | 2056 / Round: | ||||||||||||
| Career history | |||||||||||||
| Roster status: | Active | ||||||||||||
| Career highlights and awards | |||||||||||||
| Career ISFL statistics | |||||||||||||
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| Career DSFL statistics | |||||||||||||
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Bread Bowl (born January 8, 2036) is an American football tight end for the Orange County Otters of the National Simulation Football League (ISFL).
Contents
Early years
Bread Bowl was born upon his parents, Ken and Linda Rosenthal, in their first Panera Bread kitchen, on a rare cold summer night in Missouri. He began playing football at the age of 8 years old, and played many other sports, including Baseball, Hockey, European Football, and Darts. In middle school he was not an exceptional athlete, and he was ready to give up, but then his grandfather passed away. His grandfather pushed him in every aspect of his life, and his last wish was to see his lone grandson achieve great success, so Bread Bowl did it. He got some help from a growth spurt between middle and high school, and made varsity in every sport he joined, playing all four years for all of them. He became a school legend, winning his high school it's first state titles in Baseball, Football, and Darts. His 3742 recieving yards in one season is a school record. He ended his high school career with 23 school records across various sports, and 13 state titles total across 5 sports. However, he was more committed to academics, and while he recieved attention from Alabama, USC, Michigan, and his hometown Missouri Tigers, he decided to go the Bread Loaf School of English, playing D2 ball while getting the best college education he could get.
College career
His freshman year at the BLS was an immediate success. He led his team in all recieveing categories, and even had his rival school start a petition for him to be kicked out of Division 2 because they believed he was purposuefully attempting to inflate his stats against poorer competition. However, BLS would be silented in the semifinals, and they would lose again in the semifinals a year later to the same team.. Bread Bowl would work the entire offseason on improving what this one opponent was able to stop in his game. This overworking would cause the lowest moment in his career, as he tore his ACL and MCL in his left knee in week 4 of the season, forcing him to miss his junior year. The BLS would lose in the first round of the playoffs, and Bread Bowl allegedly gave a speech in the locker room blaming himself, although this has not been confirmed by a reputable source. His senior year was his best year, forgoing his draft eligibility and trying for a championship with his team, he broke every single D2 season recieving record. An opposing coach told reporters after his team was thrashed by Bread Bowl: "It's Randy Moss. How the hell is he here?" Bread Bowl kept this going in the playoffs, setting single game records and winning each of his first three games by 30 or more points. They would finally overcome the hump and win the semifinals and finally win the championship. This is a moment that Bread Bowl has repeatedly said was the best of his life, but saying winning an ultimus might trump it in a later interview. He went straight to professional ball, being claimed by the Dallas Birddogs on the waiver wire, and creating his professional journey.
Professional career
DSFL career
Bread Bowl was picked up by Dallas in the 3rd week of the DSFL season on the waiver wire. His impact at first was very minimal, but as the year picked up so did he. The Birddogs would finish with a 2-11-1 record, last in the division. Bread Bowl finished 4th on the team in total receiving yards, with 285 yards. He would also end up with the 4th most touchdowns on the team, with three. The next season, the Birddogs would finish 3rd in their division, just outside of the playoffs after losing the tiebreaker to the Tijuana Luchadores. Bread Bowl improved a lot in his first full DSFL Season. He finished 3rd on the Birddogs in yards with 655, which was good enough for fifth among DSFL TEs. He again finished with 3 touchdowns, good for third on the team. Bread Bowl would finish his DSFL career with 92 yards for 940 yards and 6 touchdowns, as he is poised for an ISFL call-up this coming season.
| Ht | Wt | 40‑yd dash | 20‑ss | 3‑cone | Vert jump | Broad | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 6 ft 11 in (2.11 m) |
281 lb (127 kg) |
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| 2057 ISFL scouting combine (S42) | ||||||||||||
First ISFL Years
Bread Bowl played his first season with the Orange County Otters, starting fifteen of sixteen games for the Otters. He had an immediate impact on his new team, as he was elected offensive captain by his teammates before even playing a game. He stated prior to week one that this was a great honor, listing many other past captains of the Otters, and saying how honored he was to be even talked about in the same sentence as people he grew up idolizing. His season was not fantastic statistic wise, but he finished the year 3rd in WPA/Play by a TE. The Otters finished 5th in their division, just missing out on a playoff spot after losing a "Win and you're in" game in week 16 to the Arizona Outlaws. He was fairly confident in his team after this loss however, stating multiple times after the game that next year would "be their year", and that they will "bring that trophie [sic] back home to Orange County".
In this sophomore campaign, Bread Bowl silenced any talk of a sophomore slump with a fantastic opening game, gaining 101 yards on 8 catches in a losing effort. Unfortunately, Bread Bowl went cold in his next few games, and the haters were out in full force. Bread Bowl famously had a back and forth with ISFL on FAX analyst Jay Cue, who said Bread Bowl was merely "...slowing his team down." to which Bread Bowl retorted in a now deleted response tweet that Jay Cue was just a "...jealous old man...who is upset the game of football passed him by." The two would go back and forth throughout the season, before squashing the beef before the week six game between the Otters and the Outlaws, Cue's old team. Bread Bowl had a noticeable lack of touchdowns during his sophomore season, it even got to the point where he had an active money bet with his own Quarterback Lloyd Bannings for Bread Bowl to get his first career touchdown. He would finally break through in week 11, as he scored against the Arizona Outlaws, finishing the season with four total touchdowns, despite the Otters having a losing season. He would end up being nominated for his first Pro Bowl nomination in the ASFC, one of five Otter Pro Bowlers in S44.
Mid-Career
In Bread Bowl's third year in the ISFL, high expectations were set for him. These expectations were not met, according to many different reporters and pundits by the end of the season. While Bread Bowl's receptions number did increase, nearly everything else remained stagnant or decreased. Including a decrease in touchdowns and Y/R, but a minor increase in yards. This would cause Bread Bowl much anguish over the course of the season, as he was rumored to be considering retirement or a position change mid-season. He would stick the season out, however, and the Otters would have a second "Win and you're in" game of Bread Bowl's career. This game would be lost again, increasing the Otter's long stretch of zero playoff appearances. Bread Bowl considers this season a "failure", and was very unhappy with how it turned out, despite the awards and stats he earned during this season, which were better than any season he had had so far in his career.
Bread Bowl's fourth season started slower than before, but it picked up steam very quickly. He set his own game record in catches in week 6, and achieved his longest catch of 68 yards in week 14. While his game records certainly improved, his season stats improved a tad bit as well. He set a new career high in season receiving yards with 761 and receiving touchdowns with 5. He also set a career high in yards per game and first downs gained. He was second among TEs in yards, touchdowns, pancakes, and had the second longest play by a TE. He was first in receptions among TEs as well. This season was a massive accomplishment for the Otters as a team. They made the playoffs for the first time since S41 as the number two seed in the highly competitive ASFC. However, they lost in a close game to the Austin Copperheads, finishing a fantastic regular season with a highly disappointing postseason. Bread Bowl finished with 8 receptions for 68 yards in the loss, saying after the game that the result was "disappointing" but that the team "still has time...we plan on being back here with a much different result, for the fans." This season was another that was shrouded by retirement rumors from Bread Bowl, with him refusing to addressing anything publicly, but private sources say that he was disappointed with his position on the season and was unhappy with his career.
Professional career statistics
| Career statistics | Receiving | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Season | Team | Games | Rec | Yards | Avg | Lg | TD |
| 2056 (S41) | Birddogs | 11 | 39 | 285 | 7.3 | 33 | 3 |
| 2057 (S42) | Birddogs | 14 | 53 | 655 | 12.4 | 54 | 3 |
| 2058 (S43) | Otters | 16 | 54 | 410 | 7.6 | 21 | 0 |
| 2059 (S44) | Otters | 16 | 77 | 653 | 8.5 | 41 | 4 |
| 2060 (S45) | Otters | 16 | 97 | 681 | 7 | 49 | 1 |
| 2061 (S46) | Otters | 16 | 94 | 761 | 8.1 | 68 | 5 |
Achievements and records
Use this section as an example.
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