Cooter Bigsby

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Cooter Bigsby
No. 1 – Retired
Position:Quarterback
Personal information
Born: (2006-07-04)July 4, 2006 (aged 60)
Toad Suck, Arkansas
Height:6 ft 7 in (2.01 m)
Weight:260 lb (118 kg)
Username:timeconsumer
Career information
College:Arkansas
ISFL Draft:2029  / Round: 1 / Pick: 1
DSFL Draft:2028  / Round: 2 / Pick: 7
Career history
Roster status:Retired
Career highlights and awards

Cooter Bigsby (born January 4, 2006) was an American football quarterback for the Yellowknife Wraiths of the National Simulation Football League (DSFL).

He played college football for University of Arkansas (Arkansas) and played quarterback in the DSFL for the San Antonio Marshals. Playing his entire nine season professional career with the Yellowknife Wraiths, Cooter Bigsby finished with 5 career Ultimus appearances, one Ultimus win, and two MVP awards. He was known as one of the most prolific passers of his era, finishing his career third on the passing yards leaderboard and with one of the highest career win-rates of any QB in league history with 82 wins and 39 losses.

Early years

Born in the nicest trailer park in Toad Suck Arkansas Cooter Bigsby was destined for greatness from a very young age. The son of a quarterback who himself was high school state champion in 1986. Cooter never knew his father after he left their family to go become a pipeliner in Alaska shortly after Cooter's birth.

Throughout his early years Cooter showed an affinity for team sports and had natural abilities as a leader. In Middle School, he was captain of the basketball team and the ace pitcher for the baseball team. But when it came time to go to high school Cooter tried out for the football team to fulfill his destiny.. Having already built a name for himself in the schoolyard football circuit the coaches knew there was no other position for Cooter than at quarterback. After spending his freshman year as quarterback of the Junior Varsity team he was promoted to varsity as a sophomore and stayed the team's starting quarterback for three years. During that time the team made it all the way to a state championship twice with little talent other than Cooter, winning the game in his Senior year.

College career

Although he was a very successful quarterback and all-around athlete in high school Cooter wasn't heavily recruited by a lot of programs. He was hoping to stay in the SEC but the only offer given to him by SEC schools was Arkansas. Not one to be too proud to go to a struggling program Cooter quickly accepted the offer and went on to Arkansas to begin his career. He was redshirted his first year and began playing quarterback in his second year on the team as a redshirt freshman.

In two seasons as a starting quarterback Cooter went on to bring some success to the program including a New Years Day bowl game in his second season as a starter. However feeling he was too great for college he decided after only two seasons of playing college ball that it was time to declare for professional football and announced his intentions to join the DSFL.

Professional career/DSFL

Season 13

Cooter Bigsby was selected on waivers by the San Antonio Marshals for their 13th season. He was a backup to their star quarterback Zenyou Wozy. Bigsby did not play any snaps that season.

Season 14

After the retirrement of DSFL legend Zenyou Wozy, Cooter Bigsby got the start for the San Antonio Marshals in season 14. This was their historic 13-1 season where they were arguably put up the best regular season performance of all time. However following this historic performance the team, led by a poor performance from Cooter in the playoffs, fell apart tragically in what was to foreshadow a future career of postseason failure.

Pre-draft measurables
Ht Wt 40‑yd dash 20‑ss 3‑cone Vert jump Broad BP Wonderlic
6 ft 7 in
(2.01 m)
260 lb
(118 kg)
4.89 s 4.85 s 7.91 s 21.6 in
(0.55 m)
7 ft 8.9 in
(2.36 m)
15 reps 44

Professional career/NSFL

Season 15

After being selected First Overall in the Season 14 NSFL draft and spending on season in the Developmental League, Cooter Bigsby traveled north into the frozen wastelands of the Northwest Territories to become the starting quarterback for the Yellowknife Wraiths and replace aging veteran quarterback Applehort. Inheriting a team that over the previous 4 season stretch had the worst regular season win rate of the entire league the Wraiths were in desperate need of a spark. Cooter went on to throw for 3426 yards and 23 touchdowns with a 80.7 passer rating and was awarded with the Offensive Rookie of the Year.

Season 16

In Bigsby's sophomore outing the Wraiths surged on the backs of a strong class of rookies as well as a few strong additions of veterans in free agency. With legends like Danny Grithead joining the Wraiths their defense took strong steps forward while also seeing the veteran WR corps prosper under Bigsby. The Wraiths went 10-3 that season fielding the top scoring offense in the league and took second in their conference. Bigsby threw for 4468 yards leading the league that season and posted a 90.6 passer rating. However in the wild card round of the playoffs the Wraiths fell to the Liberty in a 35-34 upset.

Season 17

Season 17 saw league with much tighter parity than ever before. The Wraiths took the top seed in the NSFC with a 8-5 record. Once again the Wraiths and Bigsby fielded a high octane offense however this season it was their defense that stood out as the number one scoring defense in the league. Cooter saw his volume in the passing game stumble as he dropped below 4000 yards and posted only an 80.3 passer rating thanks to a very high 15 interceptions. However Bigsby was strong in the redzone and led the NSFL with 31 touchdowns. Once again finding themselves as the top seed in the NSFC the Wraiths took a first round bye yet fell to the Hawks in the Conference Championship in another upset loss, 27-24.

Season 18

In what has been one of their best regular season performances of all time with an 11-2 record and the top seed in the entire NSFL the Wraiths looked like a powerhouse in Season 18. They had the top offense and number two defense. Bigsby led the league in yards and in touchdowns and once again threw a bit too many interceptions but posted a career high 91.5 passer rating. His strong performance at quarterback leading the top team was enough to secure him the MVP Award in season 18. But in a twist of fate all too common for Yellowknife they once again fell short in the postseason, losing the Ultimus in their own stadium to Orange County in a 16-10 loss where Cooter went 20/36 for 246 yards, 2 TDs, and 1 INT for a passer rating of 63.0.

Season 19

One the backs of a heartbreaking loss the Wraiths came out swinging once again in Season 19 looking to secure the team's first Ultimus win since Season 7. Again the Wraiths led the league in the regular season, securing the top seed with tthe top scoring offense, however they saw their defense take a large step back. Bigsby once again led the league in passing yards and passing touchdowns, yet struggled with his efficiency and posted an 87.2 passer rating with 15 INTs. Once again controlling their own destiny in the playoffs the Wraiths faced the Otters in the Ultimus for a rematch, and once again lost in a 30-27 upset with Bigsby going 26/53 for 372 yards and 1 TD.

Season 20

With their third season in a row as the top seed in the league the Bigsby-led Wraiths went 9-4 in the regular season. This season saw the team shift to a much more balanced offense with a strong rushing attack and Bigsby only throwing for 3503 yards, the lowest his entire career. Struggling with his accuracy and decision making what should have been the peak of Cooter's career was marred by offensive struggles. The team went into the postseason once more considered the favorite and faced the Austin Copperheads in Yellowknife. However, the Cooter Curse reared its head once again and with a absymal 23/48 for 278 yards, 1 TD, and 2 INT performance the Wraiths fell handily to the upstart Austin Copperheads for their third Ultimus home loss in a row. What was destined to be a dynasty had failed to close the deal again.

Season 21

In season 21 the Wraiths struggled mightily to regain their previous powerhouse status and limped into the playoffs with a 7-6 record. The once dominant franchise was struggling on both sides of the ball with only 7th highest in points scored and 6th in points allowed. Cooter put up a strong year on his own, leading the ISFL in passing yards and posting a 90.6 passer rating with a 20:7 TD:INT ratio. In a shocking playoff run the 3rd seed in the NSFC marched past the Yeti and the Hawks to appear in their fourth straight Ultimus game. However the curse proved too strong and once again the Wraiths lost the Ultimus, this time on the road facing a strong New Orleans Secondline Team.

Season 22

After another upsetting postseason finish, the Wraiths started season 22 with a whimper, losing to the Colorado Yeti on the road with a poor performance by Bigsby. However they roared back to life and went on to win 11 of their next 12, dropping one to the Second Line. The Wraiths finished as the #1 seed in the league with the top offense and the top defense. Cooter looked like his prime self once again throwing 29 TDs, only 8 interceptions, and posting a 93.6 passer rating. This regular season performance was enough for Cooter to secure his second career MVP over the perennial favorite Franklin Armstrong. Fate is not without a sense of humor however, as the top seed in the league went on to wash out of the postseason in the conference finals to the Colorado Yeti who went on to win their franchise first Ultimus over the Orange County Otters.

Season 23 Having declared this to be his final season in his football career Cooter went into season 23 a little past his prime. He had lost a lot of his physical peak and with the heir apparent QB Colby Jack waiting in the DSFL it was apparent both sides were ready to move on. Not one to spend time on sentimentality Bigsby went straight to work and with a strong Yellowknife offense they finished the #2 seed in the league with a 10-6 record. Although their points scored and points allowed were mediocre the suffocating rushing attack led by Mathias Hanyadi was enough to keep Cooter from having to play hero ball. Finishing again with a strong regular season statline they went into the playoffs top seeded in their conference once more. This time around playing in their new stadium luck appeared to be on their side. After grinding out a win against the Yeti they watched as the top seeded Otters fell to the Copperheads, meaning the Ultimus was going to be played in Yellowknife. In a blacked out dome in the final game of his career Cooter Bigsby and the Yellowknife Wraiths trounced the Copperheads 38-13, finally breaking the curse and bringing the Ultimus trophy home for the first time since season 7.

NSFL career statistics

Career statistics Passing Rushing
Season Team Games Completed Attempts PCT Yards Touch downs Interceptions Rating Att Yards Avg Lg TD
2030 YKW 14 293 521 56.2 3426 23 13 80.7 17 68 4.0 18 1
2031 YKW 13 358 608 58.9 4468 33 14 90.3 17 96 5.6 20 0
2032 YKW 13 334 618 54.0 3945 31 15 80.3 15 113 7.5 21 0
2033 YKW 13 339 576 58.9 4398 31 13 91.5 9 61 6.8 26 0
2034 YKW 13 312 545 57.2 4071 29 15 87.2 16 76 4.8 18 1
2035 YKW 13 271 482 56.2 3503 18 9 83.9 21 122 5.8 15 0
2036 YKW 13 277 477 58.1 3696 20 7 90.6 25 67 2.7 18 2
2037 YKW 13 252 445 46.6 3213 29 8 93.6 13 95 7.3 23 0
2038 YKW 16 337 573 58.8 3899 21 14 81.5 13 59 4.5 19 0
Total 121 2773 4845 57.2 34619 235 108 86.4 146 757 5.2 26 4

Championship and Disappearance

Immediately following the Season 23 championship win of the Yellowknife Wraiths in Cooter Bigsby's final season he was reported missing by members of the team. The last person to see him was teammate Mathias Hanyadi who spoke to Bigsby shortly before he drove out of the team parking garage outside the stadium. There were unverified reports of people spotting Cooter Bigsby in the following days and weeks in various places south of Yellowknife, with the final sighting being at a border crossing into Mexico. He has not been seen or heard from since.

Achievements and records

  • S15 Rookie of the Year
  • S18 MVP
  • S22 Quarterback of the Year
  • S22 MVP
  • S23 Ultimus Champion