Stumpy Jones

Stumpy Jones

An image of me at my happiness
No. 35 – Portland Pythons
Position:	Offensive Lineman
Personal information
Born:	(1950-02-22)February 22, 1950 (aged 112) Olympia, Washington, U.S.
Height:	6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)
Weight:	350 lb (159 kg)
Username:	Footballiscool
Career information
High school:	Homeschool
College:	The Evergreen State College
Career history
Roster status:	Active

Stumpy Jones (born February 22, 1950) is an American football offensive lineman who is currently preparing to enter the professional ranks.He played college football for The Evergreen State College (TESC) and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.

Early years

Well, my roots are in Olympia Washington. Supposidely, my parents are from the Oregon area but the stork literally dropped me off in Olympia Washington. I've developed strong roots in the community providing much needed support for my fellow woodland friends and transitioned into being a sturdy frame to provide a jungle gym for the neighborhood children as the neighborhood changed. The sixties were an interesting time, people started randomly knitting me scafts and mittens for my branches to keep me warm during winter...It was nice, but I wanted to say ""excuse me, I'm a tree give that to someone who needs it."" the 70s were full of upset people protesting ""the war"" and they eventually got sick on disco fever. The 80s were weird...drugs officially became a problem and it started to hit our community hard. The community had officially changed from being a forest and nice suburben area and had now become an urban jungle, all of my friends had fled. As did it, I decided to get an education to escape the community that I had known and loved.

College career

I actually started my time at ye' ol' Evergreen College by attending classes for english as a second language. When going into the guidance counsellors office they actually suggested that I go into forestry. I took a few classes and enjoyed it. While studying forestry, I had seen a flyer on a buillten board between classes for try-outs for the football team. This immediatly brought me back to my younger days I always was so envious of all of the children that were playing this game in the field next to our forest community called football and was so excited to finally try it out. Upon arriving at the field, the coach immediatly knew where to place me. He noticed that I was a "thick and sturdy boi". I started out doing the basics being on the practice team for the opposing defensive linemen to try and bull rush their way past me. Coach Roberts gave me a tips on how to handle the bullrush and how to not let defensive ends from going around me and the idea took root, I never actually played during college I only ever made the practice squad but I'm greatful for the opportunities it allowed me.

College career statistics

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Professional career

DSFL career

Drafted to the Portland Pythons. Stumpy Jones was drafted by the Portland Pythons with the 31st overall pick in the S27 DSFL draft, along side fellow pythons taken in the draft are Linebacker Xavier Walls (7 OA), Safety Remus Roman ((15OA), Linebacker Gritt Gurdur (23OA), Tight End Phillip Weaver (39OA), Offensive Lineman Tay Heenie (47OA), Running man Aleksandr Vasiliev (55OA) and Wide Receiver Kenzie Cupz (63OA). Stumpy Jones Took a liking to the locker room culture, and the Portland Pythons had an outstanding season. The S27 Portland Pythons had a dominating season 27 regular season. In fourteen games the pythons had eleven wins, three losses and outscored opponents by a margin of 157 points. All regular season losses for the pythons came at home and came against the London Royals (2pts), the Minnesota Grey Ducks (3 points) and the largest loss of the season came against the Dallas Birddogs in week six (13 points). Stumpy Jones had a breakout season winning offensive linemen of the year for the DSFL with 67 pancakes which was most in the league, 1 sack allowed and had 2 penalties for 15 total yards. The most pancakes came in that loss against the Dallas Birddogs in week 6. The Pythons would lose in the first round of the playoffs to the Kansas City Coyotes. Stumpy Jones would have a game leading 9 pancakes which was the most for a DSFL playoff game in season 27 and would stand as the record until season 30.

Pre-draft measurables

Ht	Wt	40‑yd dash	20‑ss	3‑cone	Vert jump	Broad	BP
6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)	350 lb (159 kg)	Tree s	Tree s	Tree s	Tree	Tree Tree	Thick reps

Professional career statistics

Use this page to get the stats table template.

Career statistics			Offensive Line
Season	Team	Games	Pancakes	Sacks Allowed
2042 (S27)	Pythons	14	67	1
2043 (S28)	Sailfish	16	70	7
2044 (S29)	Sailfish	16	106	2
2045 (S30)	Sailfish	16	129	0
2046 (S31)	Sailfish	16	118	0
2047 (S32)	Sailfish	16	110	0
2048 (S33)	Sailfish	16	109	0

Achievements and records

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