Kevin Finnerty
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| No. 3 – Norfolk Seawolves | |
|---|---|
| Position: | Wide Receiver |
| Personal information | |
| Born: | October 9, 1957 (aged 107) Kingman, Arizona, U.S. |
| Height: | 6 ft 1 in (1.85 m) |
| Weight: | 280 lb (127 kg) |
| Username: | Almightypasswordforgetter |
| Career information | |
| High school: | Never had the makings of a varsity athlete |
| College: | Seton Hall |
| ISFL Draft: | 2064 / Round: 1 / Pick: 2 |
| DSFL Draft: | 2063 / Round: 6 / Pick: 42 |
| Career history | |
| "* Minnesota Grey Ducks (2062 (S47)-2062 (S47)) | |
| Roster status: | Active |
Kevin Finnerty (born October 9, 1958) is an American football wide receiver for the Norfolk Seawolves of the Developmental Simulation Football League (DSFL).
Contents
Early years
Kevin Finnerty has spent much of his life incredibly confused. He has lived a double life, you see, flying between Arizona and New Jersey while in a fugue state to accomodate this double life. I am sure the reader can imagine how jarring it might be to regain consciousness and be across the country, scarfing down gabagool or beating poor Georgie over the head with an ice bucket. This, unfortunately, was life for poor Kevin Finnerty for a long time. He did not stop believing, however. After a long life as both waste disposal consultant and HVAC salesman depending on which state he was in and which life he was living, both of Finnerty's personalities decided to retire from those jobs and join forces to become a professional athlete. Not knowing which sport he would become the best in the world at, he first had to try a couple. Finnerty nearly landed on Badminton but ultimately could not say shuttlecock without laughing so settled on football.
College career
Though it was clear to Kevin Finnerty from a young age that he in fact did not have the makings of a varsity athlete, and old age had not done much to change this, Finnerty managed to start (and therefore make) a intramural football team while at Seton Hall. They became so good the NCAA had no choice but to admit the school's newfound football team to the Atlantic Coastal Conference (hey if it can happen to Stanford and Cal it can happen to Seton Hall), where Finnerty quickly became a household name. Finnerty's special talent on the field was his versatility - he was a two way player who excelled no matter where he played, from harassing quarterbacks on the defensive line to throwing blocks and catching touchdowns as a tight end. Ultimately, Finnerty drifted toward the tight end and receiver positions because of his large ego - scoring touchdowns is after all great for that. Finnerty finished his senior year as the greatest (and only) tight end in Seton Hall's storied football history.
| Career statistics | Receiving | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Season | Team | Games | Rec | Yards | Avg | Lg | TD |
| 2062 (S47) | Seton Hall | 14 | 63 | 597 | 9.5 | 39 | 6 |
| 2063 (S48) | Seton Hall | 14 | 79 | 842 | 9.4 | 61 | 7 |
Professional career
| Ht | Wt | 40‑yd dash | 20‑ss | 3‑cone | Vert jump | Broad | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 6 ft 1 in (1.85 m) |
280 lb (127 kg) |
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| 2064 ISFL scouting combine (S49) | ||||||||||||
Professional career statistics
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Achievements and records
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