Walrus Jones

Walrus Jones

Walrus Jones Before the DSFL Draft
No. 44 – Minnesota Grey Ducks
Position:	Offensive Lineman
Personal information
Born:	(2029-05-01)May 1, 2029 (aged 33) Miami, Florida, U.S.
Height:	6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)
Weight:	315 lb (143 kg)
Username:	Caravaggio
Career information
College:	University of Florida
DSFL Draft:	2052  / Round: 1 / Pick: 4
Career history
Minnesota Grey Ducks (2052 (S37))
Roster status:	Active

Walrus Jones (born May 1, 2029) is an American football offensive lineman for the Minnesota Grey Ducks of the Developmental Simulation Football League (DSFL).

Early years

Walrus Jones was born on May 1, 2029 to a family of devout underachievers. He was the child of parents that did not play football, and in fact had no athletic skills to speak of at all. Walrus was named after his grandfather Walrus, which is a family name often passed down in the Jones family.

Walrus did not pursue any sports activities at an early age, and instead concentrated on the family trade of grifting. This soon became impossible due to his burgeoning height and size, making him very inconspicuous in a crowd. He was eventually not invited to family outings, and instead had to fall back on his studies, where he found an early passion for reading and napping at his desk. This carried him much further than you would expect, and he soon found himself graduating high school and moving onwards to the University of Florida, where he majored in Napping.

College career

Football came very late to Walrus, and he did not play an organized game until his Junior year of college at the University of Florida. The team’s offensive line was decimated in the now famous firecracker hay ride tragedy of 2049, and forced the university to search for walk-ons to replenish the team and be able to field a competitive roster. To do this they had to dig deep. Really deep. Jones was selected among his classmates due to his raw size and strength, not because of any particular speed, intelligence, or technique.

His first season in college was very poor, racking up many penalties for false starts, illegal hands to the face, and in one particularly bad game, “Giving him the business” call that resulted in a 1 game suspension. While things looked bleak, he was able to reflect on his errors and come back in shape and determined for a solid senior season. The season was disastrous, and the 2050 Gators finished 10th in their division, with a record of 3-10, and the entire coaching staff fired. Out of that dumpster fire, Walrus was a bright spot, showing great improvement in his intelligence and discipline, and starting every game for the team.

College career statistics

Career statistics			Offensive Line
Season	Team	Games	Pancakes	Sacks Allowed
2050	UF	9	29	22
2051	UF	13	49	4

Professional career

DSFL career

After a short pre-draft period working with the Kansas City Coyotes, Walrus was drafted by the Minnesota Grey Ducks in the first round of the DSFL draft.

Minnesota Grey Ducks (S37)

Walrus Jones started all 14 regular season games in the Left Tackle position, mirroring the other offensive lineman draftee, Painted Penguin. As a team the Minnesota offensive line provided the best pass protection in the league, with the fewest sacks per dropback. Walrus did not allow a single sack on the left side of the formation, giving the Grey Ducks significant peace of mind during play planning. Being on the weak side of the formation, he did not get nearly as many pancakes as his teammates on the right side, but did earn 32 pancakes in total, one of the best totals from the Left Tackle position. Jones played his best game in week 7 against the Buccaneers, providing 6 pancakes with zero sacks allowed and zero penalties for the game. The Grey Ducks made the playoffs with the number 2 seed, ultimately falling to the Portland Pythons in the North Conference finals.

Minnesota Grey Ducks (S38)

Walrus Jones benefited from the position change of the Painted Penguin to Quarterback, and was moved over to the higher risk and higher reward position of Right Tackle. He started all 14 games at the position, playing against higher quality defensive ends. This resulted in his first sack allowed in his DSFL career, during the week 3 contest against the Kansas City Coyotes. Walrus’ best game came in week 5 against the Tijuana Luchadores, where he crushed his defenders with a career high 10 pancakes, allowing no sacks, and causing no penalties. Walrus ended up leading the team in pancakes with 52, which was good enough for 5th overall in the league. Overall this was a great development season for Walrus. The Grey Ducks used its experienced staff to dominate most of the league in S38, finishing with a 2nd best 11 wins and being a serious contender in the offseason before losing to the eventual champion Kansas City Coyotes.

Pre-draft measurables

Ht	Wt	40‑yd dash	20‑ss	3‑cone	Vert jump	Broad	BP	Wonderlic
6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)	315 lb (143 kg)	4.52 s	4.46 s	7.71 s	26.5 in (0.67 m)	9 ft 0.3 in (2.75 m)	37 reps	25
2053 ISFL scouting combine (S38)

Professional career statistics

Career statistics			Offensive Line
Season	Team	Games	Pancakes	Sacks Allowed
2052 (S37)	Grey Ducks	14	32	0
2053 (S38)	Grey Ducks	14	52	3

Achievements and records

No achievements yet

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