Difference between revisions of "Walrus Jones"

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==Professional career==
 
==Professional career==

Revision as of 21:23, 29 August 2022


Walrus Jones
Image of Walrus Jones
Walrus Jones Before the DSFL Draft
No. 44 – Minnesota Grey Ducks
Position:Offensive Lineman
Personal information
Born: (2029-05-01)May 1, 2029 (aged 33)
Miami, Florida, U.S.
Height:6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)
Weight:315 lb (143 kg)
Username:Caravaggio
Career information
College:University of Florida
DSFL Draft:2052  / Round: 1 / Pick: 4
Career history
Roster status:Active

Walrus Jones (born May 1, 2029) is an American football offensive lineman for the Minnesota Grey Ducks of the Developmental Simulation Football League (DSFL).

Early years

Walrus Jones was born on May 1, 2029 to a family of devout underachievers. He was the child of parents that did not play football, and in fact had no athletic skills to speak of at all. Walrus was named after his grandfather Walrus, which is a family name often passed down in the Jones family.

Walrus did not pursue any sports activities at an early age, and instead concentrated on the family trade of grifting. This soon became impossible due to his burgeoning height and size, making him very inconspicuous in a crowd. He was eventually not invited to family outings, and instead had to fall back on his studies, where he found an early passion for reading and napping at his desk. This carried him much further than you would expect, and he soon found himself graduating high school and moving onwards to the University of Florida, where he majored in Napping.

College career

Football came very late to Walrus, and he did not play an organized game until his Junior year of college at the University of Florida. The team’s offensive line was decimated in the now famous firecracker hay ride tragedy of 2049, and forced the university to search for walk-ons to replenish the team and be able to field a competitive roster. To do this they had to dig deep. Really deep. Jones was selected among his classmates due to his raw size and strength, not because of any particular speed, intelligence, or technique.

His first season in college was very poor, racking up many penalties for false starts, illegal hands to the face, and in one particularly bad game, “Giving him the business” call that resulted in a 1 game suspension. While things looked bleak, he was able to reflect on his errors and come back in shape and determined for a solid senior season. The season was disastrous, and the 2050 Gators finished 10th in their division, with a record of 3-10, and the entire coaching staff fired. Out of that dumpster fire, Walrus was a bright spot, showing great improvement in his intelligence and discipline, and starting every game for the team.

College career statistics

Career statistics Offensive Line
Season Team Games Pancakes Sacks Allowed
2050 UF 9 29 22
2051 UF 13 49 4

Professional career

Pre-draft measurables
Ht Wt 40‑yd dash 20‑ss 3‑cone Vert jump Broad
6 ft 5 in
(1.96 m)
315 lb
(143 kg)

Professional career statistics

First season in progress

Achievements and records

No achievements yet







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