Mister Hogmally

Mister Hogmally

No. 43 – Prospect
Position:	Tight End
Personal information
Born:	(1723-02-26)February 26, 1723 (aged 343) Old McDonald's Farm, Nebraska, U.S.
Height:	6 ft 4 in (1.93 m)
Weight:	250 lb (113 kg)
Username:	Istegosauruz
Career information
College:	University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Career history
Roster status:	Active

Mister Hogmolly (born February 26, 3623) is an American football tight end who is currently preparing to enter the professional ranks.He played college football for University of Nebraska-Lincoln and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.

Early years

Mister Hogmolly's beginnings are like any pigs that ends up growing up to wear a tux, a monocle, and play in a professional football league. He was born on a farm that only exists in a children's rhyme. He was not content growing up to be slaughtered and made into bacon, however, but rather wanted to be a financial advisor. He was a whiz with numbers and knew he could make it big on Wall Street. Unfortunately, shortly after his internship with Goldman Sachs in 2007, the housing market crashed and investing was no longer a "cool" or "stable" job for a young pig with a dream. Mister Hogmolly set out on a journey of self-discovery to find his next true calling. After his career on Wall Street fell through the cracks, Mister Hogmolly took the remaining money in his bank account and booked a plane ticket to Australia.

Mister Hogmolly's Journey of Self-Discovery

After his career on Wall Street fell through the cracks, Mister Hogmolly took the remaining money in his bank account and booked a plane ticket to Australia. Mister Hogmolly spent the next three years traveling the Australian outback. While he was in the outback, he met an old wise Shaman. The Shaman encouraged Mister Hogmolly to branch out and try new things, which is how he ended up in cooking school in Paris. Unfortunately, Mister Hogmolly's dream was foiled again. He was never destined to be a fancy chef - he never could find the rat that was supposed to teach him how to cook like Disney had led him to believe he would - and after being chased out of the kitchen by his teacher with a cleaver with the threat that if he returned he would be made into barbecue, Mister Hogmolly set back out on his journey to find his true calling. From Paris he traveled to Japan where he wanted to train to become a ninja, only to arrive in Japan and find that being a profesional ninja wasn't a truly viable career path. He pondered on whether he could use the training to audition for American Ninja Warrior but realized that no one wanted to watch a pig do parkour.

Discovering football

With his dream of being a ninja dead, Mister Hogmolly returned to Nebraska, depressed and unfulfilled. He worked as a dishwasher at a Waffle House for a while, a truly terrifying lifestyle that pushed him to the verge of madness due to the amount of bacon and ham that are prepared and consumed on a daily basis at a Waffle House. The night shift fry cook Larry became good friends with Mister Hogmolly and noticed that he was built like a dump truck. He invited Mr. Hogmolly to help him coach a high school football team. There, deep in the farmlands of Nebraska, Mister Hogmolly discovered football. It was love at first sight, Mister Hogmolly couldn't get enough. There was strategy and practice was required - just like there is in cooking - and it contained a physical element - just like being a ninja would have. Larry assured Mister Hogmolly that professional football players were handsomely compensated, just as he would have been as a financial advisor on Wall Street.

Mister Hogmolly began training, he finally had a dream he felt was close. The International Simulation Football League awaited, a league he was going to take by storm. Learning to catch a football with his hooves was hard, but not impossible. After training with Larry for years, he was ready to enter the league. He was picked up quickly by Minnesota Grey Ducks to get some practice reps in prior to entering the Season 35 DSFL Draft.

Hogmolly's Professional Career

In the Season 35 DSFL Draft, Hogmolly was selected by the Dallas Birddogs with the 56th overall pick. Along with rookie quarterback Roque Santa Cruz, Hogmolly went on to form a promising young offensive duo. The Pig (patent pending) was the seventh tight end in the league in terms of total receiving yards, falling over 400 yards behind the DSFL leader, American Boot. Dallas ended the season 3-11 and missed the playoffs, however the Hog (patent pending) was an important addition to the locker room and team. After the DSFL season was over, Hogmolly began preparing for the upcoming ISFL draft. He wanted to bulk up some to show the ISFL General Managers he could be a true in-line, starting tight end for a competitive team in the league. The easiest way to bulk: donuts. Hogmolly's agent pursued a Dunkin Donuts endorsement for him to no avail - no major U.S. brand wanted to be endorsed by a pig, even a talented on that played football.

DSFL Career Statistics

Career statistics			Receiving
Season	Team	Games	Rec	Yards	Avg	Lg	TD
2050 (S35)	Birddogs	14	58	388	6.7	23	2

In Season 36, Hogmolly got called up to he Colorado Yeti and took his first true snaps in the top professional league a pig could desire. He started the season on a promising note with 9 receptions for 73 yards in his first game - a close loss to the Austin Copperheads. That game would prove to one of his best on the season, as he finished the year with only 563 total yards through the air on 70 catches. The end zone was elusive for the world's favorite professional football playing pig, as he only ventured into the promise land twice on the season. there were bright notes to the season, however. Hogmolly's statistics made him the fourth most valuable pass catching rookie - falling only behind Zaphod Beeblebrox, Sconnie McSix, and fellow Colorado teammate Eeeeeeee phenssta, for total receiving yards. He was the sixth highest tight end in total receiving yards in the league as well, very closely behind Molki Koivu from the Otters who bested him by only 7 total yards.

In Season 37, Mister Hogmolly did not improve drastically on his lackluster rookie year. He caught 6 more passes and maintained the same 8 yards per reception average he put up in his rookie season. He still acted as a safety valve for the Yeti offense while the speedsters on the outside - Cole Maxwell, E phenssta, and Rocky Moreaux - worked to open space for a Yeti offense which leaned in harder to the run game as their offensive identity began to shift away from the Yeeti offenses from previous seasons. Hogmolly found the endzone an additional time in Season 37 - nabbing three touchdown receptions. With the Yeti focusing more on the run game than many may have expected, it was a bit shocking to see Hogmolly regress significantly as a blocker - falling from 30 pancakes to 37 and allowing three sacks, two more than he allowed in his rookie season. He continued to progress as a route runner and offensive chess piece but struggled with the fundamentals that help teams win games.

In Season 38, Mister Hogmolly crested the summit of success and began putting up some serious statistics. His 799 yards through the air were good for third in the league. His average yards per reception were a bit lackluster compared to other top tight ends, a product of his role as a safety valve for the Colorado Yeti. His touchdown numbers equalled his previous two seasons combined. As he heads into Season 39, Hogmolly is the highest TPE offensive weapon for the Yeti outside of their star quarterback, setting him up to build on his previous success and step into the conversation for the league's top tight end. Expectations are high within the Yeti, with 1,000 receiving yards appearing to be the low water mark for Hogmolly's upcoming season. Personally, the pig (esquire) is hoping to see mroe action in the trenches as well - with blocking being the one area of Hogmolly's game where he has not invested much time into thus far into his career.

Robbed! That's the only word that can be used to describe Mister Hogmolly's Season 39 performance. After putting up one of the greatest Tight End seasons of all time - 83 catches, 1099 yards, and 11 touchdowns - the league's favorite hog was denied a spot on the Season 39 ISFL All Pro Team. The pig is flabbergasted at the gall of voters, leaving off a Tight End who put up a truly tight season. Ignore the fact the pig realized he was a matchup nightmare at Wide Receiver and played more there than he did as an in-line Tight End, this is a conspiracy! The bacon fad is over. People are tired of it. Bacon on donuts? OVERPLAYED. Bacon on the football field? DISGRACEFUL. The only breakfast food voters care about are pancakes. Big, fluffy, delicious pancakes. Would the hog have put up the lowest total of pancakes of any Tight End to qualify for the All Pro Team in recent history? Yes. But can you blame a pig for bringing home the bacon and ignoring the carbs on the table? Absolutely not. Mister Hogmolly is ready to take the league by storm in Season 40 and bring home that big, marbled, trophy.

Holy smokes the season Hogmolly had in Season 40! 1244 yards and 10 touchdowns! Those are basically wide receiver numbers. In fact, had Hogmolly been a wide receiver in Season 40 he would have been the ninth best receiver in terms of total yards. A truly elite season for Hogmolly ended in yet another selection as second team all pro due to his weak blocking statistics.

Season 41 saw the pig take a slight step back over his Season 40 production. Had he been a wide receiver in Season 41, Hogmolly would have still qualified as a top 15 receiver and was still the best offensive option on the Yeti. Colorado found themselves building towards the future the few seasons prior, and Season 41 was no exception. Hogmolly had taken time in the offseason to focus on his blocking form, hoping to show awards voters in the coming years that he was worthy of a first team all pro selection.

Season 42 saw Hogmolly miss what should have been his best shot at a first team all pro tight end selection. A career high in pancakes while still being dominant in the receiving game, Hogmolly is one pace to have one of the best tight end careers ever, boosted by being the best offensive weapon on a rebuilding Colorado team. Hogmolly has focused on giving back to the younger team members, showing them the ropes, and helping the team build towards the future.

Season 42 saw Colorado make a major turn in their rebuilding process. Buoyed by the thought that the Yeti might begin to contend for playoff berths while he still had legs, Hogmolly showed out again as a primary receiving option for the Yeti. Season 42 is one of the first seasons of the pig's career where he had a strong wide receiver group around him, allowing him to focus more one performing as an inline tight end and leading him to put up strong numbers on the offensive line, even if they weren't career high numbers. Hogmolly ended the career with another second team all pro nod, but what is more important to the swine going forward is the potential that the young Yeti's displayed. With a blossoming quarterback, a top tier young running back, and several great options in the farm system, the future is bright for the Yeti and there's a chance Hogmolly may lift a trophy during his career yet.

In Season 43, Mister Hogmally finally broke through and had one of his best statistical seasons. With 106 catches for 1232 yards and 7 touchdowns, the pig ended the season as the sixth best receiving option in the league - far outpacing the next nearest night end, Lucius Salem for the Sarasota Sailfish, who clocked in almost 400 yards lower than Hogmally in receiving totals. Not only did the pig have a dominant season through the air, he also was the most dominant tight end in the trenches, accumulating 59 pancakes and only allowing one sack. As with his receiving prowess during the season, Hogmally outpaced the majority of tight ends by a considerable distance in his work as a blocker with only two fellow tight ends - Detective Crashmore for the Yellowknife Wraiths and Bread Bowl for the Orange County Otters - being within ten pancakes of his season totals. Hogmally's dominant season resulted in him bringing home his first First Team All Pro selection and helped the Colorado Yeti to their first playoff appearance during his career.

In Season 44, the Colorado Yeti took a step back as a team - resulting in a season that saw the Yeti end up with the fourth overall draft pick. Hogmally, however, had a dominant season reminiscent of his Season 43 performance. Although his receiving yards fell about 25 yards short of his Season 43 total, the pig put up a better yard per catch and more touchdowns through the air. His performance as a blocker saw him fall below other tight ends in pancakes but still saw him put up 46 pancakes while remaining flawless and allowing no sacks. What is important to the pig at this juncture - outside of trying to help the Yeti win a title - is his chase of Paul DiMirio's tight end receiving records. The pig ended Season 44 with 9,072 total receiving yards, 2,450 yards off DiMirio's record but still good for third all time. Hogmally needs another 13 touchdowns to break DiMirio's touchdown record of 72. Hogmally also broke into the top 10 all time in pancakes, slotting in at 8 behind Gronko Muerto and approximately 150 pancakes off Deshawn Penne's record. At minimum, the pig can make a push to end second all time in cakes before his career ends.

ISFL Career Statistics

Career statistics			Receiving					Blocking
Season	Team	Games	Rec	Yards	Avg	Lg	TD	Pancakes	Sacks Allowed
2051 (S36)	Yeti	16	70	563	8	27	2	30	1
2052 (S37)	Yeti	16	76	608	8	81	3	27	3
2053 (S38)	Yeti	16	82	799	9.7	76	5	42	1
2054 (S39)	Yeti	16	83	1099	13.2	75	11	18	2
2055 (S40)	Yeti	16	101	1244	12.3	79	10	47	1
2056 (S41)	Yeti	16	92	1081	11.6	83	5	52	1
2057 (S42)	Yeti	16	98	1198	12.2	75	7	51	1
2058 (S43)	Yeti	16	106	1253	11.8	57	7	53	1
2059 (S44)	Yeti	16	100	1227	12.3	68	9	46	0

Achievements and records

Use this section as an example.

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