Sheed Thebaw

Sheed Thebaw

Sheed Thebaw during his freshman year wearing No. 50
No. 90 – Yellowknife Wraiths
Position:	Defensive Tackle
Personal information
Born:	(2016-10-06)October 6, 2016 (aged 44) Burlington, Vermont, U.S.
Height:	6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)
Weight:	300 lb (136 kg)
Username:	Nutbarspadge
Career information
College:	University of Wisconsin-Madison
ISFL Draft:	2040 / Round: 4 / Pick: 47
DSFL Draft:	2039 / Round: 4 / Pick: 34
Career history
Dallas Birddogs (2039) Yellowknife Wraiths (2040 - )
Roster status:	Active

Sheed "The Unblockable Situation" Thebaw (born October 6, 2016) is an American football defensive tackle who is currently preparing to enter the professional ranks. He played college football for University of Wisconsin-Madison (UW-Madison). On 6th August 2039, Thebaw was drafted 34th overall by the Dallas Birddogs in the DSFL. In the ISFL S25 Draft, Thebaw was drafted 47th overall by the Yellowknife Wraiths.

Early years

Sheed Thebaw was born in Burlington, Vermont to his Mary Thebaw (nee DeVage) and father Kiko Thebaw. His mother Mary grew up Amish before she left at age 18 to explore life outside of her community. She met Sheed’s father at a Rush concert on Boxing Day 1996 in East Rutherford, New Jersey, Kiko’s home neighbourhood. Kiko grew up in the projects of East Rutherford, trying his best to stay in school, and eventually landing a job as a janitor in his local high school. After a brief romance, Mary and Kiko married and had 4 children; Stevie, Jimmy, Bobby and Sheed.

Sheed, surrounded by 3 older brothers, was often picked on and bullied by them, but he claims “that helped him become the athlete he is today” as it taught him perseverance and toughness. In a college interview, Sheed claimed that his father always said “you have to fight if you want to get anywhere in this world”.

Having played basketball throughout his younger years due to his height, when Sheed joined Rice Memorial High School he discovered football. Thebaw played running back and linebacker due to his imposing size. Following another growth spurt over the summer between his sophomore and junior years that he spent lifting weights with his older brothers and eating right, his high school coach claims that Sheed had packed on 30lbs of muscle and suggested that he may be better suited in the trenches due to his athleticism.

Thebaw spent two years all over the defensive line for Rice Memorial, quickly becoming a highly recruited 4 star athlete going into college.

College career

Highly recruited coming out of high school, he received multiple Division I scholarship offers, but ultimately landed on attending University of Wisconsin-Madison, famously stating “I love Badgers” during his commitment press conference, then immediately shaking up two cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon and pouring them both directly into his mouth, before putting the Wisconsin hat on.

In his freshman year, Thebaw recorded 36 tackles, 9 tackles for loss and 8.5 sacks playing at the defensive end position, wearing the number 50 jersey. In his sophomore year, having grown another 2 inches in height and adding another 20lbs of body weight over the summer, Thebaw moved to defensive tackle and changed jersey number to 90 as according to him "When you're this big, you need a bigger number". He flourished with a conference leading 14.5 sacks, along with 40 tackles and 11 tackles for loss. In his junior year, Thebaw suffered an ankle injury that saw him medically redshirted for the entire season. In his senior year, having spent an entire season in the gym rehabbing and getting stronger, he dominated the conference, and registered 48 tackles (19 TFL and 16.5 sacks). 3 forced fumbles and 1 interception. In the 2038 season, Sheed Thebaw was awarded the Ronnie Lott Trophy, voted AP and Sports Illustrated second-team All- American, All-Big Ten first-team, and was voted the team's defensive MVP.

Despite Thebaw's collegiate statistics, he is famously known in college football for his on field trash talk and sack celebration, which he calls "Toe Tag, Body Bag", in which he mimics pulling a dead body out, wrapping a tag round the imaginary cadaver and zipping up the body bag, followed by a salute. The salute part of the celebration was adopted in his sophomore year, after receiving a written warning from the NCAA for the original celebration, which ended in him performing a "throat cutting" motion at the end, rather than the more current "salute".

College career statistics

Career statistics			Defense
Season	Team	Games	Tck	TFL	FF/FR	Sck	Int	PD	Sfty	TD	Blk P/XP/FG
2035	Wisconsin	13	36	9	0/0	8.5	0	0	0	0	0/0/0
2036	Wisconsin	13	40	11	0/0	14.5	0	0	0	0	0/0/0
2037	Wisconsin	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0/0/0
2038	Wisconsin	13	48	19	3/0	16.5	1	0	0	0	0/0/0

Professional Career

On 6th August 2039, in what was described as the steal of the draft, Thebaw was taken 34th overall by the Dallas Birddogs. Experts and pundits had Thebaw being drafted a lot higher than 34 and he slipped down the draft board due to other teams' needs. He landed in Dallas and signed on the base rookie contract of $5 million. During his time with the Birddogs, he slowly got to speed with the professional game. He only recorded two sacks the entire season. One vs Myrtle Beach Buccaneers in a tightly contested loss, and one vs Minnesota Grey Ducks during a 13-0 defensive shut out in which Thebaw earned the game ball for the Birddogs. Thebaw also amassed 39 tackles and 2 tackles for loss across the season. It is rumoured that most offenses in the DSFL schemed the ball away from Thebaw so that he could not impact their game plan, with quick passes and outside runs being prevalent for all to see. Statistically low by Thebaw's own high expectations, Sheed Thebaw has been training during the off season in conditions rumored to be below zero in the deep north of Sweden. With limited access to social media and technology, he plans to enter the ISFL with a renewed energy and focus on being the best defensive tackle in the league, working on his speed and strength, and reclaim the glory he once had during his college career.

In the ISFL S25 Draft, Thebaw was drafted 47th overall by the Yellowknife Wraiths and signed a $7 million contract with a no trade clause.

Pre-draft measurables

Ht	Wt	40‑yd dash	20‑ss	3‑cone	Vert jump	Broad	BP	Wonderlic
6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)	300 lb (136 kg)	4.40 s	4.40 s	7.52 s	28.5 in (0.72 m)	10 ft 0.7 in (3.07 m)	35 reps	14

Professional career statistics

Career statistics			Tackles			Sacks	Interceptions		Other
Season	Team	Games	Reg	TFL	Total	Sack	Int	IntTD	DefTD	FFum	FRec	PD	Safety
2039 (S24)	Birddogs	14	39	2	41	2	0	0	0	0	0	0	0
Total		14	39	2	41	2	0	0	0	0	0	0	0

Awards

Individual

• 2038: Lott Award
• 2038: AP Second-Team All American
• 2038: All-Big Ten first-team
• 2038: Wisconsin Badgers Defensive MVP