Ben Slothlisberger

Ben Slothlisberger

Ben Slothlisberger is known for playing with a pack of smokes tucked into his pants.
No. 6 – Tijuana Luchadores
Position:	Quarterback
Personal information
Born:	(2026-06-09)June 9, 2026 (aged 34) The Moon, Space, Hungary
Height:	6 ft 7 in (2.01 m)
Weight:	260 lb (118 kg)
Career information
High school:	Lansing Catholic
College:	Central Michigan
ISFL Undrafted:	2037
Career history
Roster status:	Active

Ben Slothlisberger (born June 9, 2026) is an American football quarterback who is currently playing for the Tijuana Luchadores in the DSFL. He played college football for Central Michigan (CMU) before being drafted with the fourth overall pick in the 2037 ISFL Draft (S22).

Early years

The early years of Ben Slothlisberger are largely unknown, as no one really knew Ben until he enrolled at Lansing Catholic high school. One day Slothlisberger appeared in the office of Cougars' head coach Jim Ahern letting him know that he wanted to be the school's quarterback. Ahern was suspicious at first. There were no records of Slothlisberger playing football anywhere in the state of Michigan or any of the surrounding states. Internet searches of "Ben Slothlisberger" also returned no results, which perplexed the Lansing Catholic coaching staff. They figured at that point they would invite the would be QB to a practice just to see what he was all about. Quickly Ben wowed the coaches with arm strength that was out of this world. It was obvious Slothlisberger needed some coaching up, but the raw talent was there. After practice, Ahern grabbed Slothlisberger to let him know he had made the team.

"Where did you say you were from again son?"

Ben: "Oh, I didn't say.... but I'm from the moon."

The coach was perplexed, but did think to himself that the change in gravity would explain why Slothlisberger was so slow. No one decided to ask any questions about Ben Slothlisberger's origins, and he went on to break almost every school record at Lansing Catholic, leading them to back-to-back perfect seasons in his junior and senior years. Despite his success at the high school level, he did not receive many offers from power house schools, and Slothlisberger opted to stay in state and go to Central Michigan University.

College career

Ben Slothlisberger started as a true freshman for the Central Michigan Chippewas, starting from day one due to his advanced physical development. The Chippewas would go a respectable 8-5 in their first season with the young Slothlisberger at QB, ultimately losing in the Famous Idahos Potato Bowl against Wyoming. The team would improve in Slothlisberger's sophomore year, with an overall record of 10-3 and achieving a bowl win in the Little Caesars Bowl over Purdue. In his final two seasons, Central Michigan did not lose a single game as Slothlisberger led them to their first two National Championships. There are rumors that the school will be erecting a statue of Slothlisberger in front of their football stadium.

Slothlisberger ended his career at Central Michigan holding every major quarterback record. He amassed over 16,000 career passing yards and 169 career touchdowns. He left the school owning their record for most career completions and highest career yards per pass average. Ben Slothlisberger helped turn Central Michigan University into a recruiting powerhouse where they still stand with the top of the college ranks to this day.

College Scouting Reports: DSFL Network draft analyst Mock Mayike said, “From a physical skill set, I think Slothlisberger has the biggest arm in the draft. I think he has a quicker release than any of the other QB's. He’s tough. I think he played behind a very poor offensive line without a whole lot of help. When I look at that kid and what he did on tape, he can make throws that I don’t think the other kids can make.”

Anonymous scouts: An athletic player with "good body control, good feet and good change of direction."

"Loves to compete, will get after you, and hates to lose."

"Very bright, learns and retains football well, is a quick study."

"We put on his highlight tape, and I see the strong arm, quick release, consistent velocity and leadership abilities. There are also some negatives—throwing off his back foot, floating the ball and overall footwork—but coaches say those deficiencies could be overcome with time and proper instruction."

College career statistics

Career statistics			Passing								Rushing
Season	Team	Games	Cmp	Att	Pct	Yds	Y/A	TD	Int	Rtg	Att	Yds	Avg	TD
Template:2036	ISFL	13	420	520	80.7%	4,589	11	44	13	150.4	5	4	0.8	0

Professional career

DSFL career

Ben Slothlisberger was ruled eligible for the Season 21 DSFL draft. He had a few private workouts for teams, but mostly Slothlisberger was looking forward to putting his skills on display during the Prospect Bowl where he was placed on the Indianapolis Iguanas. The Iguanas appeared to have a bevy of talent on the offensive side of the ball, so Slothlisberger looked to have a good Prospect Bowl in anticipation of the DSFL draft.

The Prospect Bowl started out great for Slothlisberger and the Iguanas. Their first game was a hard fought win, with Ben Slothlisberger throwing a touchdown in the effort. The team's spirits were riding high going into game two, and they hoped to punch their ticket to the championship game. Unfortunately for the Iguanas they came up short in game two. Slothlisberger put on a pedestrian showing, and he was seen smoking numerous amounts of cigarettes on the sidelines. The press wondered if this performance would drop the large QB down DSFL teams' draft boards.

But the worries about Slothlisberger's draft stock were unfounded, as the young mooninite was selected in the first round, pick four by the Tijuana Luchadores. He was the third quarterback to be drafted after the Jack brothers went to the new DSFL expansion teams. In an interview after the draft Slothlisberger disclosed to the media that Tijuana was his top destination all along, and he was very excited to get to work for the fans in Mexico.

S21

Unfortunately for Slothlisberger and the Luchadores, their first season was very up and down. The team drafted another quarterback late in the DSFL draft, and Slothlisberger ended up splitting snaps with Jim Waters for the entire season. The team was mired by 1-1 stretches before breaking through with a 2-0 streak. Unfortunately they would go on a long losing streak that would result in the team missing the playoffs. The Luchadores would end up with a 6-8 record, disappointing the fans. Slothlisberger finished the season 7th in total attempts, 7th in total passing yards, 7th in completion percentage, 9th in total touchdowns, 1st in least interceptions (for starters), and 5th in QB rating.

Slothlisberger has been seen training hard in the off season in anticipation of the NSFL draft, and season 22 looks to be a big one for the young quarterback as he caps his DSFL build in the offseason.

Pre-draft measurables

Ht	Wt	40‑yd dash	20‑ss	3‑cone	Vert jump	Broad	BP	Wonderlic
6 ft 7 in (2.01 m)	260 lb (118 kg)	5.01 s	4.94 s	7.94 s	20.8 in (0.53 m)	7 ft 4.59 in (2.25 m)	8 reps	44

S22 NSFL Draft There was a lot of hype going into the Season 22 NSFL Draft, as the incoming draft class was one of the biggest the league has ever seen. With many potential superstars across all the DSFL rosters it was uncertain where Ben Slothlisberger would ultimately end up. Early on in the draft process the New Orleans Second Line, who had just previously won the Ultimus, emerged as a strong suitor for the young gunslinging quarterback. The Second Line owned the drafts second overall pick as well as the first round's last pick, and speculation was that Ben Slothlisberger may be targeted with either pick.

As the draft process went on it was fairly clear to the public that Slothlisberger was destined for the Big Easy. Despite positive interviews with other franchises, the fit in New Orleans just seemed right. Ultimately, the draft rumors were correct and Slothlisberger would be selected by the Second Line. Unsurprising to some, Slothlisberger went off the board in round 2 of the draft, at 17th overall and he was the first quarterback selected in the draft. Two more quarterbacks were drafted at the end of round 2. With the draft complete, the Second Line sent Ben Slothlisberger back down for another season in Tijuana as current QB Stan Francisco had plenty left in the tank.

S22 DSFL Season The Tijuana Luchadores went into the S22 DSFL season atop many of the media's power rankings. Sporting two capped quarterbacks and a capped running back, the offense looked poised to explode with many exciting young receivers joining the squad. The season started out slowly for the Lucha, as they dropped their first two games to Norfolk and London (which will come in later too). Tijuana would not let this bring the team down as they would go on to rip off four straight wins including a victory over the reigning champions Myrtle Beach. The Luchadores would go on to have a strong season, ending at 10-4 in the regular season and securing home field advantage throughout the playoffs.

Slothlisberger was part of the Luchadores' number one rated offense on the season. Tijuana scored 330 points, with only two other teams even breaking the 300 point threshold. Sharing the workload with Jim Waters, Slothlisberger attempted the seventh most passes in the league and managed to put up the sixth most yards with 1797. Slothlisberger led the league in completion percentage at 62.7%, no other quarterback mustered even 59%.

Slothlisberger played well in Tijuana's opening round, throwing for 121 yards and a touchdown to lead the Lucha over the Norfolk Seawolves. In the Ultimini, the Luchadores faced the London Royals and edged out a 10-6 win to secure the championship. Though Slothlisberger did not play particularly well in the Ultimini he was crowned a champion. With another DSFL looking likely for the young quarterback, can he make it two rings in a row?

S23 DSFL Season

After the high of the S22 Ultimini win, the S23 Tijuana Luchadores stumbled in Ben Slothlisberger's last season in the DSFL. The Luchadores lost many of their S22 players to NSFL call ups, and the team knew it would be in for some struggles.

Oddly enough, Slothlisberger was the sole QB for Tijuana in their first three weeks of the season. The team went 1-3 in those contests, losing both road games to Dallas and Minnesota and winning at home against the Portland Pythons. In week 4, young Mike Boss Jr. would start splitting snaps with Slothlisberger. Going 2-1 over their next three games, the Luchadores were feeling confident with their recent success, and they looked to get some momentum rolling towards a playoff push.

Unfortunately, that push was not in the cards. Three straight losses to Norfolk, Dallas, and Portland pushed the playoffs out of the picture for Tijuana. They would go on to win 3 of their remaining 5 games, but would still miss the playoffs after tasting Ultimini glory the season prior.

Ben still had a solid season despite missing the playoffs. He broke 2000 yards while completing over 61% of his passes for the second season in a row. Slothlisberger was also second in the league in passer rating (first place had 100 less throwing attempts). The cherry on top for the young QB's S23 season was being elected to the DSFL Pro Bowl with 10 of the 11 possible votes. Tijuana may not have achieved greatness in his last season, but it was still a productive campaign for Ben Slothlisberger. With the DSFL awards and offseason looming, Slothlisberger now sets his eyes on New Orleans as he has been called up to lead the team in the upcoming season.

ISFL career

S24 ISFL Season With the retirement of Stan Francisco, Season 24 saw Ben Slothlisberger finally start his ISFL career with the New Orleans Second Line. The ISFL saw three new rookie QB's starting in S24, and Slothlisberger looked to prove he belonged with the best of the best.

New Orleans managed to open the season with a win at home over their bitter rivals the Orange County Otters, 27-12. Slothlisberger was quickly introduced to the new game speed and he took 3 sacks in his first game, a trend that would continue during the season. The Second Line managed the young quarterback's workload, asking him to only throw 23 times in the game. Slothlisberger threw two touchdowns without an interception, his first career ISFL touchdown going to longtime Second Line running back Forrest Gump in the third quarter.

The Second Line would continue on to win their next two games. Slothlisberger did show a bit of carelessness, throwing three interceptions in those next two games with a less than stellar completion percentage, so it was no surprise that Ben's season saw some speed bumps. New Orleans would lose their next two games to division rivals Austin and San Jose. Slothlisberger was cutting down on his turnovers, but he was wildly inefficient otherwise, a trend that would continue throughout the season.

The New Orleans Second Line would finish the S24 regular season with a record of 9-7, good to get them into the playoffs without a bye. Slothlisberger finished with 3605 passing yards on a 56% completion percentage, throwing 22 touchdowns and only 8 interceptions. His 85.8 passer rating was best of all the rookie quarterbacks and was good for 5th best in the league over league leaders like Banks II and Jay Cue. Unfortunately for Ben and the Second Line, they would lose on the road in the playoff's opening around against the rival Otters.

Yet it was still a positive season for the quarterback. There are rumblings that Slothlisberger could be nominated for and even possibly win the Offensive Rookie of the Year Award. He vowed no matter what after S24 that he would be back and better than the season before.

Professional career statistics

DSFL career statistics

Career statistics			Passing							Rushing
Season	Team	Games	Completed	Attempts	PCT	Yards	Touch downs	Interceptions	Rating	Attempts	Yards	Touch downs
2036 (S21)	TIJ	14	120	226	53.1	1222	4	4	67.4	2	-1	0
2037 (S22)	TIJ	14	170	271	62.4	1797	6	9	75.5	9	22	1
2038 (S23)	TIJ	14	186	305	61	2005	10	8	80.3	5	21	0
Total		42	476	802	59.4	5024	20	21	75.9	16	43	1

ISFL career statistics

Career statistics			Passing								Rushing
Season	Team	Games	Comp	Att	Yards	Pct	Lg	TD	Int	Rating	Att	Yards	Avg	Lg	TD
2039 (S24)	Second Line	16	288	514	3605	56	54	22	8	85.8	21	80	3.8	22	0

Achievements and records

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