Difference between revisions of "Sardine Beaner"

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'''Sardine William Beaner''' (born March 6, 2016) is an [[wp:American football|American football]] [[wp:Defensive Tackle|defensive tackle]]. He played college football for Florida State University (FSU) and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.
 
'''Sardine William Beaner''' (born March 6, 2016) is an [[wp:American football|American football]] [[wp:Defensive Tackle|defensive tackle]]. He played college football for Florida State University (FSU) and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.
 
  
 
==Early years==
 
==Early years==
"Sardine Beaner was truly never one to catch a football, or let alone a ball, period. However, Sardine Beaner went throughout his high school and college career loving football and almost every sport known to man, from golf, to bowling, to cricket, to baseball, to football, to disc golf, to boxing, to even strip poker. One of those caught his attention more than the others upon his enrollment to the Florida State University following his high school graduation: strip poker.  
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Sardine Beaner was truly never one to catch a football, or let alone a ball, period. However, Sardine Beaner went throughout his high school and college career loving football and almost every sport known to man, from golf, to bowling, to cricket, to baseball, to football, to disc golf, to boxing, to even strip poker. One of those caught his attention more than the others upon his enrollment to the Florida State University following his high school graduation: strip poker.  
 
 
Stepping aside from what he did in his leisure time, though, Sardine Beaner did also try out for the football team having been a key element of his high school's football defense, as he was known to tackle anyone in his way due to the sheer size and weight of the bull of a man he is, weighing in over 300 pounds and towering over opponents at six foot five. Enemy teams have never refrained from cowardliness on the field, often never even trying to stop him as he towered over them and had them begging for their mothers to remove them from the football team to try participating in marching band instead. Nevertheless, Sardine Beaner's story continues with his record of concussing five opponents in one game (it was co-ed night in his senior year... poor ladies...). Florida State University strengthened his skills, and his teammates thanked the lord every night that he was on their team and not someone they would have to face. "
 
 
 
 
 
  
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Stepping aside from what he did in his leisure time, though, Sardine Beaner did also try out for the football team having been a key element of his high school's football defense, as he was known to tackle anyone in his way due to the sheer size and weight of the bull of a man he is, weighing in over 300 pounds and towering over opponents at six foot five. Enemy teams have never refrained from cowardliness on the field, often never even trying to stop him as he towered over them and had them begging for their mothers to remove them from the football team to try participating in marching band instead. Nevertheless, Sardine Beaner's story continues with his record of concussing five opponents in one game (it was co-ed night in his senior year... poor ladies...). Florida State University strengthened his skills, and his teammates thanked the lord every night that he was on their team and not someone they would have to face.
  
 
==College career==
 
==College career==
"His high school coaches had persuaded Beaner to give defense a try in college, and he performed about as well as a 310 pound tower would be expected to. Stomping over any offensive line in his way, Sardine Beaner would become notorious as a player that nobody wants to face ever. After acquiring an NCAA ten game suspension for knocking all of the teeth out of the University of Florida quarterback's mouth as a result of a tackle, the Florida State coaches agreed he should reach out to the NSFL which had already taken an interest in the lumpy dumper to further his career where the opponents are an equal match, and this is where we leave off with the soon-to-be-legendary Sardine Beaner.  
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His high school coaches had persuaded Beaner to give defense a try in college, and he performed about as well as a 310 pound tower would be expected to. Stomping over any offensive line in his way, Sardine Beaner would become notorious as a player that nobody wants to face ever. After acquiring an NCAA ten game suspension for knocking all of the teeth out of the University of Florida quarterback's mouth as a result of a tackle, the Florida State coaches agreed he should reach out to the NSFL which had already taken an interest in the lumpy dumper to further his career where the opponents are an equal match, and this is where we leave off with the soon-to-be-legendary Sardine Beaner.  
 
   
 
   
When interviewed on his thoughts of the suspension, as well as the idea of venturing into the NSFL, Sardine Beaner was noted to say, ""I'd do it again... At least I'll be paid to do so now by folks who understand my art and the talent associated with it..."". May god have mercy on those who have yet to see what is coming for them on the football field."
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When interviewed on his thoughts of the suspension, as well as the idea of venturing into the NSFL, Sardine Beaner was noted to say, "I'd do it again... At least I'll be paid to do so now by folks who understand my art and the talent associated with it...". May god have mercy on those who have yet to see what is coming for them on the football field.
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 
==College career statistics==
 
==College career statistics==
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==Professional career==
 
==Professional career==
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 
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Revision as of 02:42, 24 December 2019

Sardine Beaner
No. 63
Position:Defensive Tackle
Personal information
Born: (2016-03-06)March 6, 2016 (aged 45)
Lake Worth, Florida, U.S.
Height:6 ft 5 in (1.96 m)
Weight:310 lb (141 kg)
Career information
High school:Park Vista Community High School
College:Florida State University
Career history
Roster status:Active

Sardine William Beaner (born March 6, 2016) is an American football defensive tackle. He played college football for Florida State University (FSU) and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.

Early years

Sardine Beaner was truly never one to catch a football, or let alone a ball, period. However, Sardine Beaner went throughout his high school and college career loving football and almost every sport known to man, from golf, to bowling, to cricket, to baseball, to football, to disc golf, to boxing, to even strip poker. One of those caught his attention more than the others upon his enrollment to the Florida State University following his high school graduation: strip poker.

Stepping aside from what he did in his leisure time, though, Sardine Beaner did also try out for the football team having been a key element of his high school's football defense, as he was known to tackle anyone in his way due to the sheer size and weight of the bull of a man he is, weighing in over 300 pounds and towering over opponents at six foot five. Enemy teams have never refrained from cowardliness on the field, often never even trying to stop him as he towered over them and had them begging for their mothers to remove them from the football team to try participating in marching band instead. Nevertheless, Sardine Beaner's story continues with his record of concussing five opponents in one game (it was co-ed night in his senior year... poor ladies...). Florida State University strengthened his skills, and his teammates thanked the lord every night that he was on their team and not someone they would have to face.

College career

His high school coaches had persuaded Beaner to give defense a try in college, and he performed about as well as a 310 pound tower would be expected to. Stomping over any offensive line in his way, Sardine Beaner would become notorious as a player that nobody wants to face ever. After acquiring an NCAA ten game suspension for knocking all of the teeth out of the University of Florida quarterback's mouth as a result of a tackle, the Florida State coaches agreed he should reach out to the NSFL which had already taken an interest in the lumpy dumper to further his career where the opponents are an equal match, and this is where we leave off with the soon-to-be-legendary Sardine Beaner.

When interviewed on his thoughts of the suspension, as well as the idea of venturing into the NSFL, Sardine Beaner was noted to say, "I'd do it again... At least I'll be paid to do so now by folks who understand my art and the talent associated with it...". May god have mercy on those who have yet to see what is coming for them on the football field.

College career statistics

Come back to this bit. Not sure how to generate the table yet

Professional career

Pre-draft measurables
Ht Wt 40‑yd dash 20‑ss 3‑cone Vert jump Broad
6 ft 5 in
(1.96 m)
310 lb
(141 kg)


Professional career statistics

Come back to this later

Achievements and records

Come back to this later [[Category:]] ""