Pasta The Turtle

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Pasta The Turtle

No. 54 – Prospect
Position:	Offensive Lineman
Personal information
Born:	(1880-01-01)January 1, 1880 (aged 183) Newfoundland, Canada
Height:	3 ft 5 in (1.04 m)
Weight:	350 lb (159 kg)
Username:	Visceralpotamus
Career information
College:	University of Newfoundland
Career history
Roster status:	Active

Pasta the Turtle (born January 1, 1880) is an American football offensive lineman who is currently preparing to enter the professional ranks.He played college football for University of Newfoundland (Zerk) and has declared his intent to enter the professional ranks next season.

Early years

"Pasta the Turtle was born in a swamp in the geographical region best known as Newfoundland to two parents, who in true reptilian fashion, had abandoned their eggs. WHile he held no ill will towrads them, Pasta did struggle to find an identity. He quickly discovered an athletic prowess that granted him opportunities heretofor unimaginable for someone of his genetic makeup. He initially developed an aptititude for ice hockey, even finidng some success at the professional level. While he really valued his time playing hockey with his team mates, he eventually found that he found something was missing. He eventually found what he was looking for while watching his favourite college team the Maryland Terrapins that he realized football was his calling. He enrolled for a tryout at the local university, and the skeptical coach gave him a chance after seeing some of his hockey highlights. It was quickly determined that offensive line would make sense given his body composition and aggressive attitude. ""Lord knows I love my carbs,"" Pasta shared to a local university paper ""so when I heard that there was a position that feasted on pancakes, you know I had to get me some of that"" "

College career

Newfoundland not being known for their football prowess, did not garner the best results on the field, but it certainly did serve as a showcase for the first turtle to have played football for their school. Pasta the Turtle quickly gained a reputation for his fearless, tenacious and tireless approach to the game. He would frequently zero in on his assignment, and could be found driving a backside defensive end into the bleachers. Given the poor team performace on the field, Newfoundland fans instead focused on the amount of pancakes that Pasta would accrue. The concession stand eventually transitioned to only serving flapjacks. "Our boy Pasta the Turtle out there eating pancakes all day, we figured we should do the same" a local fraternity spokesman shared when queried about the student body's refusal to purchase any food item other than pancakes. "While an area of improvement in Pasta's game could certainly be his pass protection, as his offensive line did surrender a substantial amount of sacks, the raw tools are clearly there for Pasta the Turtle to develop into a dominant NSFL offensive lineman. The intagibles, hunger and drive are all there" reads a scouting summary describing his amateur career.

College career statistics

Career statistics			Offensive Line
Season	Team	Games	Pancakes	Sacks Allowed
Template:NCAA	ISFL	14	75	0

Professional career

Pre-draft measurables

Ht	Wt	40‑yd dash	20‑ss	3‑cone	Vert jump	Broad
3 ft 5 in (1.04 m)	350 lb (159 kg)

Professional career statistics

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Achievements and records

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